How to Move on and love again from a hurtful break up 

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One way or the other, we have all have been in any kind of relationship, be it dating, friendship, family e.t.c in these relationships, sometimes we put our 100 and forget to plan for failures. In my post titled 7 reasons we fail backwards, I wrote the way we plan for success, is the same way we should plan for failures. Though it not advisable to wish bad for yourself but we cannot but prepare for these things (failures) for better living. The teenage age is the age that suffers hurtful break ups that leads to depression often. When we encounter or find ourselves in hurtful breakups, do we really know how to manage it properly? Have experienced different break ups and I’m going to use one of my friend’s experiences to guide you on how to manage breaks ups.

One of my friend’s experiences happened like this. He dated this lady for almost 6 years, thought he was going to get married to this person but for no reason, the person left and got herself another man immediately. That got him ruined for that period. Never did he think he could experience such hurtful moment. He made up his mind not to love again and be in any relationship but guess what? He is in love again and happy but stronger and smarter.

How you can do this for yourself? 

  1. Give yourself time to heal: Because from a hurt break up, you will be hurt. Give yourself time to recover from the hurt. To recover from the hurt, make yourself aware of the situation, cry if you want, laugh is you want, eat as much if you want, go out if you want. Do anything to get your mind off the hurt. With time, you will get better because time heals.
  2. Forgive even if he or she doesn’t apologize: This action will make your recovery better and will make you be able to make intelligent actions in the future. When you are forgiving, you are doing yourself a favour than the person you are forgiving buy clearing away the grudges you are holding within.
  3. Get smarter: Try not to fall in the same situation anymore, learn from the situation and use what you have learnt in your next relationship and other aspects of life. You don’t fall in the same situation twice, it’ll only make you be perceived as not intelligent and get hurt again which you can avoid by learning from the situation. We go through experiences to be better and stronger.
  4. Study what went wrong in the relationship: Where you the problem? Was he the problem? If possible ask you ex what went wrong and get his or her own perspective and adjust accordingly for better future but avoid being a pest
  5. Don’t underestimate yourself: Don’t think you were not beautiful enough or handsome enough for your ex. You ex was probably not meant for you or your ex was unable to see the beauty in you or in your flaws.
  6. All men and women are not the same: We all have different DNAs, we are all unique.
  7. Search and you shall find: Don’t give up on genuine love. Wish the best for yourself always and the best will always come.
  8. When you find the one, pray the best will always come for you both. Always hope for the best.

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